Movie Review # 539: Black Phone (2022)

Alright, now we shall review one of the newer films that was released in theaters just a few weeks ago, and is currently still in movie theaters. I will confess that I had not originally intended to see this film since it is a “horror film,” which I don’t normally watch that genre. However, since a friend of mine really loved it enough to see it again, I went ahead and saw it with him. So now, let’s review Black Phone.

Plot: When a young boy named Finney (Mason Thames) gets kidnapped by a child kidnapper, and serial killer called the Grabber (Ethan Hawke), it is up to Finney to try to find a way out of his new prison before he becomes one of the fewer children to eventually end up dead like the other kids that have died in the past. Now, with his brains, and his sister Gwen’s (Madeleine McGraw) ability to see visions of situations like this, can these two work together for Finney to escape from the Grabber once and for all?

Well, though not exactly one of the best films, Black Phone at least has a few things to enjoy about it. For one, it does a good job of showing how there are in fact serial killers in the world, and how kidnappings, and things like that happen all the time. It was also good to have a main character praying to God from time to time, even if there were one, or two times where those moments felt a little convoluted.

However, even if this film received mostly positive reviews on Rotten Tomatoes, that doesn’t make Black Phone one of their best films. Even if it wasn’t for some of the potential horror elements that occur in this film, the film doesn’t feel all too pleasant. For one, some of the family members in this film act very abusive at times. Okay, I understand that that’s common in real life especially nowadays. But come on, do we really need to have movies, and media like that to throw that in our faces? Also, is it really necessary to have a character throw cuss words at God while praying? Again, it’s understandable that maybe the filmmakers might have possibly had the character be honest about her struggles, and anger with God, but still. Also, what was with the supernatural element at different points when the main character is in prison? Okay, I understand that maybe the main character kid needs motivation to try to escape, but still. And yes, it was good to have this film be suspenseful. However, either with the scary, and creepy music that plays throughout this film, or maybe the serial killer wearing a creepy mask, or things like those, Black Phone seems to go a little to over the top with the suspense element. You can have suspense, but there’s a way to do so in a more pleasant way like with L.A. Ambulance, or some film like that, you know? Oh, and the kids in this film are not always pleasant to watch onscreen.

And that’s my review for Black Phone. Yeah, after watching films like Black Phone, I think I remember why horror films aren’t exactly the best genre of film to watch. The movie is way too creepy at times, a lot of characters are mean-spirited, and it has some elements that seemed to be a little unrealistic for this type of film. I would say that if you want to see a more pleasant, and suspenseful film like L.A. Ambulance, a 007 James Bond film, or movies like those. Any of those might be more fun than a film like Black Phone any day.

Final Grade: D